lawebloca:

The salmon send their best assassin
diacrit:

hanesonly:

I almost forgot my briefcase!

it contains important lab results

skylinegiraffe:

ezelsklap:

niallwardvevo:

ventai:

HE HAS RETURNED

HE’S BACK

THE GOD

"Prostitute" was honestly the highlight.

nickyrads:

leander-ligo:

lordthundercox:

Yes, it does.

Guys get morning wood because our bladders fill up during the night and begin to press against our prostate, causing arousal. Our dicks don’t just feel the sun coming up and think “My time has come”

I’m dying
matthewsagan:

This is a lion making a kill in the wild. I know it’s very graphic but I think it’s important to show just how brutal nature can be.

youngstero:

how can peach and mario just like casually play tennis with the giant dinosaur turtle monster who is always threatening both of their lives? they all just set aside their pasts to have a good old game of tennis? also did bowser raise bowser jr. himself? is bowser a good father?

ectoghostologist:

i love being tight with teachers because you get to hear them talk shit about other teachers its so funny they all act like highschoolers except they get paid 

(Source: alluka)

faithsuperfab:

vvankinq:

#NotAllDucks


i just had to reblog this for the face tbh

placatory:

When you order something online and it finally comes

image

jordanleeemerson:

vronboy:

water-lesbians:

whitetail-music:

fuckyeahragetoons:

blowing up bridges 

This must be the most satisfying job

its looks like sonic ran across that bridge


I did this once

gOTTA GO FAST
each-beat:

I remember when we were teenagers and just getting our licenses. I was trying to set you up with one of my best friends, and I wanted it to work out so bad (but apparently you liked me the whole time!) We were all hanging out one day, driving to see a movie (you in her car and me in mine) when my friend randomly pulled to the side of the road. I pulled over to see what was going on. You got out of her car, walked over to mine, and sat in the passenger seat. I looked over at you perplexed, and you grinned but with a worried, concerned look on your face. “I didn’t want you to have to merge on the highway by yourself. I know how much it scares you.” You were (and still are) the sweetest. Who would’ve thought that 5 years later we’d be married and that you’d still be the one to help me calm me down when merging into traffic (and reminding me to breathe when passing huge trucks in the pouring rain).